THE BLUE TARP WALTZ

I am sore from laughing so much - there have been TWO Jeff Dunham specials on Comedy Central (the guy with the puppets - Walter, Peanut, Jalapeno On-A-Stick), and he is just too much. It doesn't help that my husband and son are not watching the show, they are watching me as I roll on the floor. Reminds me of the time Harmony and I went to some scary movie, and the guys in back of us were watching US jump instead of watching the movie.

My main accomplishment of the day has been (drum roll, please) getting the seven bales of hay that I had JUST purchased this week (translate that into $104.97) all covered up and tucked in comfortably with their teddy bears (not really - I only let them sleep with pacificers, but no toys) before the rain clouds hit (why do we say 'hit'? How about drop, or scatter, or relieve themselves - wait, forget that last one, that image is not one I want to think of). Everyone seems convinced that Arizona is all desert, and I'm here to tell you we have had WAY too much rain this year. I don't like having to watch for clouds, figure out which way the wind is blowing, and calculate how much time I have to get a leash on the greyhound, run out to the shed (which, unfortunately, still has a very incomplete roof due to the fact that Carls Jr. has re-claimed my son for the entire Christmas break, and I cannot lift the roof by myself), tie up the greyhound in a way that she will not kill herself (it's a complicated mixture of the right knots, threats, and orders to MY dog to watch her), cover the hay with a tarp... wait a minute, where is the tarp... oh, yes, it was obviously blown off LAST night, and it now at the far end of the horses' pasture, so I need to run down there and get it... and pray that the greyhound will NOT strangle herself... and then peel the tarp off the barbed wire... run back (and terrify both my horses as a galloping blue mass comes charging towards them), retie the greyhound (who has not killed herself, but has managed to get the leash around herself four times), throw the tarp over the hay, and then find enough heavy things to put over the tarp so (hopefully) I will NOT have to run to the far end of the pasture tomorrow.

Wow, I have to catch my breath now.

And I haven't even gone outside yet!