HERE KITTY KITTY

I am responsible for five animals - make that six, if you count my husband. I mean, I exercise them (we just won't go there in detail), take them to the doctor when they are sick , listen to them when they want to complain (believe it or not, the horses especially need to vent... a lot), and I feed them.

So when I forget to feed them... well, they get hungry.

I normally don't go into the laundry room unless I am (duh) doing laundry. But I have a cat feeder that stores about a week's worth of cat food, so it usually works out. The water for the cat sits right next to the large freezer, and even if that runs dry, he can (and does) drink the dogs' water (he maintains that I obviously provide them with bottled water, while his is only tap water).

Pandora (that's the cat) is verbally extremely expressive, and is not subtle in any sense of the word. If he wants something, he gets it across to you REAL fast.

So I should have figured it out the other day when Pandora got incredibly cuddly that he had something else up his sleeve... or his fur, I guess, in this case. He snuggled and licked and purred... and he is NOT a purring cat. He does snuggle, but only on alternate Thursdays in months that begin with the letter "A."

When these polite, nice tactics obviously were not getting through my thick human skull, Pandora began a slightly more forceful approach - he began to bite me.

I don't take well to physical discomfort (although I do believe my pain threshold is pretty high - I mean, I've been married for over thirty years to the same man), so Pandora got chased off. And I kept an injured distant from him for the next 24 hours.

Then suddenly, he wasn't there. I mean, he wasn't ANYwhere there. He wasn't laying on 'his' table by the window, he wasn't on my bed, he wasn't under the other one of 'his' tables (the one the dogs can't get to), and he wasn't in the shower (one of his favorite spots - it's cool on the tile, and he has a VERY very thick coat of fur).

And when I did check in the laundry room to see if he was sulking in there, I noticed.... HE WAS OUT OF CAT FOOD. COMPLETELY.

Suddenly a whole host of past feline experiences came to mind. I have had several cats adopt me, only to find out later it was simply because I offered them better food than their home. And I seriously believe that the only cat that has deliberately 'left' me did for the same reason - I mean, someone offered a higher grade of cat kibble.

So I immediately was CERTAIN that Pandora has hit the road, stuck his... paw out, and was off to greener pastures... or at least available food. I also straight away was overcome with GUILT. I was an unworthy animal owner - I had STARVED my favorite cat and FORCED him to go away from HOME.

After searching our house one more time, I opted for a very last, desperate move.

I filled up his food bowl.

And then, of course, he instantaneously materialized at my feet.

Geesh.