Thursday, April 16, 2009


Some times I think I should be on the lecture circuit, and get PAID for all the advice I dole out on a daily or (dare I say it?) hourly basis.

I mean, people actually make a living from saying basically what I say on auto-pilot to my second daughter just about every day.

She and I sat at Denny's today for probably 45 minutes, while she ate a short stack of pancakes (infuriated, I must admit, since I refused to pay for a Grand-Slam-Cholesterol-Laden-Clog-Your-Arteries-In-Under-Five-Minutes combination of greasy meats, egg yolks and piles of carbohydrates with melted lard) and I gave her my standard pep talk.

You know the one - "Yes, you are having some problems now but if you keep pressing on and working the sun will come out and shine and angels will sing the Hallelujah chorus from Handel's 'Messiah' and Zac Efron will ask you out..."

Wait a minute - that was the talk she wanted me to give her.

No, I gave her my not-quote-memorized-but-close mom-encouragement think-positive good-attitude speech.

And about midway through it, I realized the man at the next table was actually listening.

He wasn't taking notes or anything, but he was paying attention.

I immediately thought, "Hey! If this was copyrighted, then I could charge him for the lecture!"

There are numerous websites about 'accredited' life-coach training, with wonderful wording - for example:

Today, coaching is a highly recognized and respected occupation, (however) since coaching is not counseling, social work, sports psychology or psychotherapy, there are no state or regional laws for "coaching" someone on important issues in their life. There is also no government-approved governing body for the coaching field. (In other words) you have complete freedom in selecting your specific training and how you develop your business and your career.

I think I've found my new career.

(And the acronyms in the blog title? "American Certified & Credible Life Coach","Completely under the Table and Unregulated Income", and "Just How Gullible Are You")