Friday, September 17, 2010


"A man grows most tired while standing still.

So I'm exhausted.

I strained my back day before yesterday, reaching from the back of my galloping horse to rescue a starving kitten from the grasp of pursuing wolves...

Okay, okay, no, it was actually taking socks out of the dryer.

But this dryer was obviously possessed by an evil spirit.

When I bent over to remove the clean dry laundry, the machine reached out, viciously grabbed my lower back & twisted me into a pretzel - until, with my mind powers, I grabbed my light saber and sliced off the electrical power cord as well as cleaning its lint filter in one swift move. Then, with Heidi Klum on the attack as well as her blow-dryer on my side, we burst out only to have to deal with three days of being unable to stand up straight.

(Okay, dudes, it's way to late to try to write anything actually amazing - my apologies!)