POLITENESS IN TRAFFIC JAMS

The adage is do-unto-others-as-you-have-them-do-unto-you (actually, it is "Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them", Matthew 7:12, but I can't quote that right off the top of my head).

And I do struggle to incorporate this in even dire, possibly life-changing situations - such as letting someone else merge into your lane while you are idling and sitting perfectly still in a massive traffic jam.

This evening, I took my daughter's car for an extended drive into the Hawaiian sunset for one pure and simple reason - to use up the gas in the tank.

Shipping automobiles is a regular concern for military families when you are stationed overseas - such as Hawaii (yes, I know it's a state, but both Alaska & Hawaii are both considered 'overseas' tours by the military). 

 And before they will take your car on-board, you must have less than a quarter tank of gasoline - safety reasons.

My son-in-law was willing to simply let the engine run until it got to the prescribed limit -- I figured it was better to go for a long drive.

And he was right.

Hawaiians, known for their aloha spirit, graceful manners and easy temperament turn into ogres at rush-hour. It may be in part because there is only one highway to get from Honolulu to any place eastward (H1), and only two ways to the windward side of the island (H3 or around Diamond Head).

And when the choice is between being polite and giving up your position in line by a few meters, it gets fairly nasty.

As if letting ONE car get ahead of you will make a more than nano-second change in the time you arrive home to watch television for the rest of the evening... when you have a DVR and are already recording anything you really want to see.

It got pretty nasty out there tonight.

But now, at least, there is very, very, VERY little gasoline left in the car.

BIG CITY

To someone from Los Angeles or New York, Tucson is a quaint little desert town.

That would have been me thirty-five years ago.

To someone from a place like Palominas, Arizona, Tucson is a noisy, crowded and unfriendly place.

And that was me today.

I drove my daughter up to see a pain specialist in Tucson, and took the big leap of signing up at Costco, so at least when I'm up there with her, I can stock up on paper towels and toilet paper.

And for someone from Los Angeles, it is ludicrous to feel intimidated by a town the size of Tucson.

But now, living on a dirt road, three miles off the highway, without streetlights, utility poles and/or traffic lights... I must admit I was actually uncomfortable with speeding cars, quick lane changes which are necessary, and what the hell is the difference between "I-10 - Phoenix", "I-10 - Tuscon" and "I-10 - Downtown Exits" and why do you have to choose one four times when all three of them end in EXACTLY the same place?!

Sorry - exhaust fumes have obviously clouded my thoughts.

HONOLULU TRAFFIC

The true reason for my all-paid, all-inclusive Hawaiian vacation must now be disclosed.

I am an extremely expensive babysitter.

My daughter and her husband have a chance (I refuse to use word the 'opportunity' anymore; subject for a blog sometime in the future) to spend a week in San Diego sans kids. That is, they can spend this week because of ME coming in to watch my grandkids for a week.

I have been looking forward to this for a long time.

However, I know that Kate can literally run in circles for hours. I know that my grandson can outwit me fairly easily - I mean, he's 5, and I'm almost 55, so the odds are in his favor to begin with.

But the real interesting part is going to be the commute.

Colin is in a private school. After having all three of my own children begin school here in Hawaii, I fully and completely support the concept - public education here is not very high quality (although I love all you teachers in Hawaii - the system stinks, not you!).

However, there is a bit of a drive involved.

To those of you who are not acquainted with Hawaii, there are a couple of things you need to know for my complaints to make sense:

#1 - Hawaii is composed of islands.

#2 - Oahu, where my daughter lives, is an island.

#3 - Islands have limited amounts of ways to get from one place to another.

#4 - There is only one main road from my daughter's house to the school where my grandson's kindergarten class is.

#5 - Every weekday morning, there are approximately 1.3 million people need to take that exact same road to get to work.

Since the school begins at 8:00 a.m., and most business begin at 8 or 9:00 a.m., the traffic here suddenly becomes very un-aloha with drivers refusing to yield their place in line, speeders darting in and out of holes in traffic (completely obvious of the drivers having to slam on their brakes to avoid them).

So what should be a fifteen drive becomes an hour + sitting in crawling traffic.

With a five year old and a two year old.

Thank God for whoever invented DVDs and put them in cars.