SOLVING MULTIPLE PROBLEMS

Here are the problems:

- I need more exercise. I have lost a few pounds, but my body has cleverly compensated for the lower of caloric intake by clinging on to every fat cell available, claiming a close personal friendship of some twenty some years. And unless I force up my metabolism to pick up in some way, I don't think anything else is gonna come off.

- I also have two horses who both seriously need more exercise. However, the mare (Sally) is an very slow walker (she is in her mid-20's, which for a horse is seriously old), and the gelding (Najale) strides out at a fast enough pace that I need to occasionally jog to keep up with him. And I cannot take just one of them out - the mare literally freaks out if seperated from her baby.

- I optimistically purchased a Wal-Mart on-sale (read that as  'cheap') bicycle, with the concept being of riding it to the mailbox (a mile and a half down the road) and back as a work-out. My only requirement was some form of mountain-bike tires - while I live on what is officially called a dirt road, it is actually 25% dirt, 13% small rocks, 46% middle-size rocks and 16% large boulders that can easily blow out a tire on a semi. Transportation of these back-roads involves constant veering around rocks, easing through gullies and ridges, and praying that whatever sort of wheel you are riding on can survive at least one more day.

Today, I discovered a marvelous and also quite ridiculous solution to all three of these problems.

I rode the bicycle for about twenty minutes in the pasture, both chasing and being chased by the horses. It was great exercise for all three of us.

And I did leave a note inside the house that if I did not come back within 45 minutes, they should search for my body out back.

It was ridiculously fun, extremely undignified, and just what I needed today.

"I WROTE A FEW CHILDREN'S BOOK.... NOT ON PURPOSE" - STEPHEN WRIGHT

My life is an open book - very similiar to the intellectual level of the children's books by Sandra Boynton.

Many individuals manage to remain aloof, mysterious, reserved - you cannot tell what they are thinking or feeling.

I, however, am the type of person who shares confidential medical information with the next person in the grocery store line.

So I should not be surprised my family knows me as well as they do.

My oldest daughter in particular.

Especially after spening a year together raising a three-year old, a newborn, and a whole group of young women ages 12 to 16 in Chula Vista.

She got me this for Christmas - I'm gonna read it tonight.

A BICYCLE BUILT FOR ONE OLD LADY

A couple of weeks ago, I rode a bicycle (my daughter's) for the first time in years.

So I went ahead and bought one when I got back home.

And tonight I rode it for the first time.


Not everything went well.

The seat, which has this niffy little 'quick-set' so you can change the height on the bicycle seat, immediately fell down every single time I sat on it.

The chain fell off.

Twice.

The brakes worked, after a fashion, but made a constant irritating noise - much like the sound of a squirrel being slowly ground to death by a sander.

It was fantastic.

And to top it all off, I took the bike inside the horses' pasture.

And chased my horse around like a manic with the bike.

Can't imagine a better way to spend an evening.